Happy Sunday!!

Well, I started this out as a rant against my spouse, but I think I will hold off. It's the same petty stuff. I never thought it was so difficult to get someone to pick up after themselves or to take pride in their appearance and things. Apparently, I was wrong. Apparently, picking up your laundry, putting it in the appropriate basket (whites, others, jeans), putting it away after I've washed it, and not using the laundry room as a changing room are just too difficult. Even when one agrees every week to do all of the above. Stupid and petty on my part? Perhaps. But I happen to like my house, and I want to have people come over and be comfortable in it. I cant' do that when there are styrofoam cups from work laying around, and clothes on the folding table and floor around it (from them being piled so high and then rummaged through when getting dressed) and no tobacco on the table (he rolls his own cigarettes which saves a lot of money, but I'm sure it's not good for the cats/dog to taste it!!) and so on and so on.

(Believe me, what I deleted was a lot longer!! )

So, the above picture was a Friday/Saturday project. I got the pattern from users.fmg.uva.nl/skats/crochet/hands
ch.htm and with some modifications I got the above. My arms are not one long skinny size. The building where I work is rather chilly in the mornings, but not so much I need a sweater yet. And in the afternoons it's too hot for any thing heavier than a polo shirt or such. These will fit the bill nicely, I think. And I found out that they are apparently "in style" no less. Girls at my son's school wear them. I did a shorter pair in white with a different pattern, but I didn't like those as much. Right now I'm working on an "acorn bag" for a friend. It's supposed to be big enough to hold a pair of socks while being knit. We'll see. I might need to make a 2nd one with a bigger hook!!

I am still working on the cabled heather wrap from caron.com/projects/ss_heather/CN0995
_cabled_wrap.html in deep teal heather. I needed some instant gratification projects this weekend though! I also did quite a bit of work on my son's flannelghan. I should have that done by his b-day or Christmas.

I am walking on our afternoon break with a couple gals. Not much, but it's given me about a 10% increase in my steps on my pedometer. This upcoming week is our last week in training and then we switch to night shift. So the 22nd I'll be working M-Th 12:30-9pm, Fr 11am-7:30pm and alternating Saturdays 8am-4:30pm. The upside to that is that in the mornings, after my son gets on the bus, I can watch my tv show from the night before while on the treadmill. For now I'll have to use this old-fashioned gadget called a VCR. Once I have my credit cards paid down (off!) then I will get Dish Network. I had an appointment scheduled using my debit card for billing purposes. But they require a $1 hold on a credit card overnight before they will send a tech out! What on earth?!?! I was super mad, and I still don't understand it. A debit card is just as good. They "offered" to let me ask a close friend or family member to use their card (ain't going to happen!) OR I can pay for the equipment up front and not worry about the 24-month commitment (which I never said would be a problem)....for $399. So we went from a $1 "hold" to $399 in less than 30 seconds. BUT they have the best value package so if I want something with DVR capabilities, that is what I will need to do. DirectTV will let you have 2 DVRS but you only get one free after rebate, you have to pay $100 upfront for the other one and I wanted to just lease the equipment for now. If I'm going to pay for equipment with TiVo, I also would have to pay an extra $15 a month for the service. DishNetwork gets me 2 DVR units (one upstairs and one downstairs) plus 100 more channels (including some we really want and are not an option with our local provider) for the same cost.

So anyway....lol back to that whole VCR thing. The quality is poor, but it will work for now. So Tuesday mornings I will watch "Into the Unknown with Josh Bernstein" (hottie alert!!), Wednesday mornings I will watch "Fringe" (new show and another hottie alert!), Thursday mornings will be "Ghosthunters" and Fridays I don't know yet. Nor Monday mornings. Those shows are all on before I get home at night. And at an hour (with commercials, which I'll probably fast forward through) long they will be great for watching while on the treadmill!!

On that note....this got really long! I'm happy to report my friend's daughter is cancer-free and so they can focus on the infectious processes her body is fighting. Still sending many thoughts and prayers her way.

~~Heather

Happy September!!

No, I don't mean that this will be my only post this month. I am still not quite sure what happened to August.

I started at my new job on Sept. 2. I was glad to start although I am nervous about taking the calls. We took our first ones today (as training reps) and I did the best out of my training class of 4. It is collections, and I didn't think I would enjoy it or be very good at it. But I am great on the phones and this is just another variant. I was also fortunate to have some good calls. There is 1 gal in my training class whom I cannot stand. The other 2 gals also cannot stand her, so I don't think it's just me. She appears to be fairly clueless and we're not entirely sure of how she managed to navigate the site to even apply for the job. One gal has been trying to help, and feels she is falling behind instead. Our trainer is aware of the situation, and will help out as she can.

I think I will do well at the job, we'll see how well I enjoy it, however. We'll see. On the upside, everyone there is very friendly and willing to help. It will also be nice, when I go to my regular shift, in that I will be able to carpool with the same gal I carpooled with at VanDykes. That will help cut down on the gas to drive 20 miles one way every day!!

Our puppy is enjoying his new home very much. The new owners have offered to let us come visit, which was really sweet!! Our older girl seemed to miss him but I think is enjoying being a "single child" again. It is definitely a lot quieter and a lot calmer. I miss him, but not the hyperactivity.

My son is doing well in school so far. He really seems to be enjoying himself. Hopefully things will stay on course when I get to my normal shift (12:30-9pm M-Th, 11:30a-7pm F and 8am-4:30pm alternating Saturdays). I'm a little concerned about his ability to stay on task. We'll see.

Things are okay with my spouse so far. Hopefully this will continue. No trips to the casinos, at any rate.

Hope all is well with all my readers!!

~~Heather

Happy Sunday!!

I hope everyone is having a good Sunday. I decided to do a little work, and what I thought was a short dictation was actually 28 minutes long and took me almost 2 hours to complete. Yikes! By the end I was telling the doc to stop repeating himself. I am pretty sure the last 5 minutes were just "the patient and his wife know they can return to the emergency department at any time if the symptoms return, if the symptoms worsen, or if new problems arise." He would say something else, and that line again. Uff-da. It net me almost $20 for that one report though, so I am not going to complain....much!! lol

After that I put up a new mailbox. Apparently a tree branch fell on ours while my son and I were in the Hills. It had gotten to the point where the mailman couldn't close it anymore. My spousal unit has not noticed yet. No surprise there, since he doesn't notice that all the towels were removed around the house and washed, and he had to get a new one for him to use in the shower. He uses mine instead. I'm sorry, but I find it gross to dry my face with the towel someone else used on their butt.

Still no "no" from my (hopeful) new job. I don't want to jinx, it though. I did get a letter from Experian that they did send them a credit report. And what was sent doesn't look overly bad, actually. Of course, of the 5 things, 3 are from when spousal unit and I had a joint checking account and he decided to do a check loan thing. I take that back...2 are. One is his hospital bill. The other 2 are my bankruptcy and then a small claim from 2002 that I know I paid off before I bought my old house. We'll see what happens. That is one thing I *hate* about being married...I can do everything right and *still* not be able to get a loan because *he* defaults on stuff without telling me!!

But...it could be worse. I have a friend who's daughter is going through a nightmare thanks to incompetent daughters. Many hugs and prayers going her way!!!! I am grateful that I am healthy and that my son is healthy.

Speaking of, he is thrilled with his school schedule. He will be taking Video Production 1 and 2 this year. He's already got some crazy ideas thought up!! Curse you, Mythbusters, curse you!! They will be learning to work with a green screen, and I can't wait to see what he is able to do. He took some hard classes this year: Personal Finance, World of Economics, and Intro to Business. But he sounds very enthusiastic about all of them, which is good.

Our puppy goes to his new home tomorrow. We will miss him, but I think he will greatly enjoy it. 7 acres and horses to play with. It will be nice and quiet at night, though.

I found a wonderful pattern at Simplicity....and it was already out of print!! I need professional clothing at my new job and I am severely lacking in the shirt department. I have lots of material hanging out, ready to be put to work. Thankfully, I found the pattern on eBay and should have it in a week or so. The pattern number is 4164 if you get a chance to check it out.

This week I will be sewing with the patterns and material I do have, as well as cleaning house. Dad is coming to visit for Labor Day weekend, plus my in-laws will be here for Labor Day itself. So cobwebs beware...I'm coming after *you*!! I will also fit as much MT work in as I can. I am pretty sure of which contract I will have to give up, but we'll see. I may be able to keep them both, too. A lot of work, but that's okay.

On that note...I better go finish up the laundry and get things put away!! Thanks for reading, have a Blessed day!!

~~Heather

Potentially Good News Today

Pending a drug test, employment history verification, references, and credit check, I start with First Premier on the 2nd. Yay!! The only one I'm worried about is the credit check. They are only looking for credit card chargeoffs and fraud, so I should be okay. It is a great starting wage, is full time, and has good benefits. It will be nice not having to scrape for money all the time, although the first couple of checks will be to get my bank account up above a 0 balance again.

I got my first check from my 2nd MT company today, and it was off by $8. I knew it would be small, only $18 and change, but it was $10.01!! So my first thought was that the gal who trained me told me wrong on figuring up the lines. Sure enough, the total I was paid matched my stats from the software, not the line count from Word. I'm not mad, because the normal method is that stat counter (and Word includes lines we don't put in there, they are system-generated). I'm just frustrated overall with the gal who trained me as she gave me quite a bit of incorrect information and non-information. I would say that half the questions I asked her, she didn't know the answer to. But it's still a decent contract, and so I won't complain.

I called my nephew today on Skype (so we can see each other with the webcams) and the first thing he asked for was our hamster (aka our leopard gecko! lol). He did finally call it a gecko (before it was a snake!) and found it very funny as Ziggy was climbing up my shoulder and tickling my neck!! It was really neat, and I love being able to see him like that, since I can't see him in person as often as I would like.

I finished the Pacifier Bear I had been crocheting. What a relief! It is absolutely adorable, but because of the loop stitch, it took forever! I can't post pictures because I don't want the recipient to see it yet. It's her Christmas gift. Or b-day gift. Whichever works. She'll get them all in October. hehe

Over the weekend I read the last 2 books in the Twilight Saga. Oh man. I cannot wait to see the movie. Conveniently moved up to the weekend after my son's b-day...is it wrong to take him for his b-day when I also so desperately want to see it?? But now I'm at a loss. I don't feel like working on my 2 afghans, nor my wrap, nor read the Stephen King novel I just bought (the first in the Dark Tower series, I've never read them!). I'm sure I'll figure something out to do.

On the DH front...things are as usual. He's all lovey-dovey now that I have this conditional job offer. Didn't bother to call or apologize for being 3 hours late coming home. Typcial. Once I am done with training (last day of training is the 19th of September) he gets the ultimatum. One more misstep and I am through. I do not need the headaches.

On that note...time to find something to do...like go through my closet and dig out my professional clothes....ugh. It's a call center...why can't I wear jeans???

~~Heather

Happy Friday!!

Most people are off on weekends, so to all of them, TGIF!!

I technically am scheduled to work a few hours each weekend day with one contract, and the other I can log on when I want. But it's all good. I can still enjoy Fridays!!

I didn't post last night...we had an electrical storm come through. Lots of lightning for about 3 hours. Thunder that made the house shiver. It was great. I did get to finish reading "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" and now I need to go back to the library to get the other 3 books. I have one more mystery to read that I checked out from the library, then I can get on with the Twilight series. Then Tanya can talk about them with me!

I had an interview at the local grocery store for the liquor department. Rather ironic, since I'm not much on drinking. We'll see, I haven't heard back from him yet. I also haven't heard back from First Premier. I called them this morning to check on the status, and she said she would call back...but I am not holding my breath at this point. I don't understand why there cannot be a happy medium. There are no full time jobs for me, but my DH is happy where he is, and also has a standing offer for more money with benefits. (He claims he will negotiate with his current employer when his supervisor gets back, as we really do need health insurance.) But all I can find are jobs that pay $7-8 an hour for 15-20 hours a week. It's better than nothing, but I still feel like I am being wasted here. *sigh* Well, something will come up, right?

I am now debating on opening a checking account at USBank or WellsFargo. My credit union is in the Black Hills, 300 miles away. Makes it hard to cash a check when my son's grandmother sends it. For now, we've mailed it to my Dad to cash and get a Visa gift card to mail back. I'm leaning towards USBank, they offer a bit more for me. We'll see.

We have 2 hits now on our pup. I will be sad to see him go, but I think he will enjoy being able to run around a farm much better. I am very appreciate of these families, because they are taking the time to learn more about him and his breed before making the decision. Something I need to work on.

Today's plan, since it is my day off, is 30-60 minutes on the treadmill, and work on sorting my office. I really hate the decluttered look it has. I've always tried to keep my work spaces neat, but my home office seems to be a "catch all" for stuff. *sigh* I can usually get a bag of stuff to either throw away or give away when I start sorting, so that's where I start.

Thanks for reading!!

~~Heather

Beautiful Wednesday

It's another beautiful day here. I feel kinda like Garfield there, though. Not a lot of gumption.

I received 4 boxes of Harlequin romances today off Freecycle. I sorted through and found 1 box that I would keep (some of which is actually Reader's Digest Condensed Books) and then the rest I will re-list. I'm actually searching for 1 book in particular, "One Thousand Roses" or "A Thousand Roses" or something along those lines. I just really enjoyed that book. I'm also looking for "Silken Web." I'll enjoy these, though, I'm sure. Have to get my romance somehow.

The rest of the afternoon I will spend working. I am rapidly finding out that 20 minutes sitting in an office chair at the store is nothing compared to spending hours in it at home. Unfortunately, the one I really wanted (and should have gotten!) is no longer offered at the one store I know used to carry it. So I work in short bursts, and then move back to the living room for awhile.

I did find a yarn that is close to the yarn I was using for a teddy bear for a friend. Hopefully she won't pick on me too much. Thankfully, she's a knitter (I crochet) and so she knows that sometimes the yarn doesn't last as long as it should and you can't find a match again (even in the same brand and type!!). I should be able to finish it up this weekend.

I just read "The Old Man and the Sea" today for the first time. I enjoyed it. I'm not 100% sure I understand it, but I enjoyed it. Tomorrow I pick up the last 3 books by Stephanie Meyer and will read those through the weekend. A friend was nice enough to loan all 4 to me, but she only had 1 done when we were visiting in the Hills.

No plans for the rest of the week, just work and get through it.

~~Heather

Sunny Tuesday!!

Three days of blogging in a row...that must be some type of record for me. It's a beautiful day out, not too hot but still requiring the use of the AC. I can live with that.

I managed to do another 60 minutes on the treadmill...30 at a "workout pace" for me, and 30 at a stroll. It's not as hard to carve out that hour as I thought it would be, but then, I'm probably using it as an excuse not to work.

School starts for my DS in 8 days. 8 days. Woohoo!! (Not that I'm counting or anything. And it could be worse (for him)....Sioux Falls is starting on Monday already.) My goal is at that point to get up and do the strolling pace while outside walking my dog. Then I can just do the 30 minutes later in the morning or in the afternoon. We'll see what happens. Either way, my DS is going to start getting up a whole lot earlier tomorrow!! Time to break the habit of sleeping until 9:30-10:00!!

I haven't heard back from the company I interviewed with a couple weeks ago. I still am hoping, though. No news is not bad news, right? Thursday I will be doing a "pep test" (perhaps a precursor to an interview?) in the liquor department of the local grocery store (well, still 20 miles away, but close enough). It's only part-time, but it's better than nothing.

We have decided to give up one of our dogs. A very hard decision, but he really needs someone who can give him more attention than we do. He has a longer coat than I thought and it needs daily brushing. He also needs more training. We will miss him, but it will be for the best. He's a doll, and we love him, we just aren't as attentive as we should be. We listed him on Freecycle, but only 1 hit and that was for someone who wanted us to take him over 100 miles. Is it wrong of me to think that if you can't afford to come pick him up, then you can't afford his vet bills also? (We did specify in the "listing" that you must be able to pick him up here.) Of course, if we get no hits, we'll have to figure something out. He may be "stuck" with us!

Well..off to work some more! Thanks for listening to my rambling!!

~~Heather

Rainy Monday

I thought this picture was funny. At the bottom of the screen when our local news or the CBS morning news is on, they have temperatures for the larger towns & cities. I'm originally from Rapid City, and I still have friends and family in the area, so I watch for it yet. Today, it appears the entire town was missing.

My not-so-dear DH is off to work for a couple hours. On his day off. Because they're going to have a busy lunch. Since he did the schedule this week, one would presume he would have been smart enough to schedule for that. Mind you, he is on salary, so he gets no extra pay for this, and it taxes the already tight gasoline budget. But he doesn't think like that. When I finally told him my thoughts on how much gas he *should* be using based on the lowest gas mileage he's told me he's gotten (15 mpg in a 1994 Pontiac Grand Am with which I *had* been getting 28 before we met?) and the size gas tank, and asked why it seems like he uses so much more (he's running out of gas again between paydays, so he's borrowing money from work), his reply was it's because he's running a lot of errands for work. Excuse me?? You're using our gas money to run work errands?? Enough that it's taking up almost 50% of our gas budget?? I told him no way, he needs to get reimbursed for that because we can't afford it. No comment from him (this was Friday) and he's off to work on his day off. Lovely.

I know...developing a crush on TV personality is exactly what LuckyDuck2 said yesterday... Safe. What can I say, I'm a romantic at heart. But I do know nothing would have ever come of it. I am lucky in that there is no physical abuse, no verbal abuse. But there is what I would consider emotional abuse. Not to mention the gambling and the lying. There is no sex life, and no attraction either. He did help do dishes this weekend....after he got pissed off at me for trying to explain to him about DS's reaction. That, and when company is coming or I say "This is what we're going to do today" are the only times he helps out around the house.

I could go on and on, but I really should get some work done. It's all pretty much SSDD, and until I can make enough money to be self-supportive, I'm stuck. Wal-Mart is looking pretty good again...the horrors!!

~~Heather

A bit of a funk

Well...I'm in a bit of a funk. You know that feeling that you've lost something before you even got the chance to have it? I'm going through that right now.

I've been having problems with my DH for several months now, almost 1 year. I to this day am still not sure why I married him. I really think it was the thought of being married that I was marrying, not him, if that makes sense?? I also think if I had met him living alone instead of with his mother helping her keep her house, I probably would have known more then, and probably would not have continued dating him, let alone marrying him.

I have not yet given him the ultimatum. I still do not have job. I had an interview that I think went well, but is dependent on my credit. I had filed for bankruptcy in 2005, and then things have been added since then due to the whole situation with my DH. We'll see what happens. I have not heard back on any other applications/resumes, which is disheartening.

To add a little more to my poor, already deranged mental status...I developed a crush on one of the main investigators on one of my favorite shows. Nowhere could I find his marital status, so I foolishly let myself daydream about meeting him and blah blah blah. Well, I found out yesterday that he is, in fact, married. I don't know why it upset me so much, but it did. I think it falls under the "losing something before you even had a chance at it" category. It also pretty much reinforces that I should never have married my DH. He was not the right one.

On my myspace page, under people I want to meet, I put "my soulmate, that one person I cannot live without." It seems like a funny thing to say when one is married, but what is sad is that I could live without him. I would miss him. He's not a "bad" person, not an "evil" person. Just not a "compatible" one. This week has reinforced that in how he and my DS have been getting along, and how he has reacted when I try to explain to him why my DS reacted the way he did. There is very little respect flowing between those 2, and it's very sad.

So I'm in a bit of a funk. I've got this opportunity I feel I missed out on, even though I have never actually met the guy, and even though he's married, and seeing the places he's been able to go through that TV show just reminds me of how much I wanted to do in my life, and how little is going to actually get done. It doesn't help that I watched "The Bucket List" this weekend (VERY good movie!! but it really does make you think...) and then Bernie Mac died at age 50. I never knew him, but he was a very funny guy. He was also only 4 years younger than my mother when she passed away unexpectedly. Everything is kind of combining to make me wonder how short my life is ultimately going to be.

Two questions asked by the keepers of Heaven, per Egyptian legend, that you must answer correctly before you are allowed in:

1. Did you find joy in your life?
2. Did you bring joy to someone else's life?

I have found joy in most of my life. I have a wonderful son, great pets, good friends. But I also know I am missing out on so much...

As for number 2....no. Plain and simple, no.

~~Heather

Whoa....I missed something there. What happened to July????

I blinked. That has to be it. I blinked and July was *gone.*

Sadly, along with it has gone a lot of the respect I had for my DH, and I am now making plans to become self-sufficient again. Once I do, I will give him an ultimatum: You gamble one more time and we are through.

While we were in the Hills, he chose to gamble the last of his money. Thankfully, this time the bills got paid first, but still. That meant no groceries. And for me, no caffeine. Yes, I have a caffeine addiction. If that is the worst thing I am ever addicted to, I will count myself very lucky. (And really? I'm not sure if it's caffeine, or carbonated beverages. I'm okay with Diet Sprite, too.) But he made sure he had tobacco to roll his cigarettes. *sigh* AND he called me the morning we were coming home to tell me to get gecko food because he'd "had a bad night." Mind you, he was supposed to have gone fishing the night before. I'm pretty sure you don't catch walleye in a casino. So there went the last of my b-day money from my father, which I am specifically *not* supposed to spend on household/auto/pet supplies/items.

So, while I love my MT work, it's not enough to be self-sufficient yet. Tomorrow I have an interview at First Premier, in their collections department. With my current credit, I doubt I will get hired, but since the worst they can tell me is "no," we'll see what happens. I have a few other applications out there, as well.

In the interim, I'm training with another MT company, and so far I am enjoying it. I am hoping no news is good news from QA, too. I am also going to spend more time working my other contract. The pay is low, but some pay is better than "no" pay.

Today I had small goals:
Hit my 10 report max with ST.
Get 10 reports with OTM.
Do 30 minutes on the treadmill.
Shower.

I have 8 reports done for ST and 4 for OTM. I'm not sure I'll hit that goal, but I'm pretty close.

I didn't do 30 minutes on the treadmill. I did *60*!!! I did 30 at a "workout pace" for me...then 30 as a cool-down/stroll to see if I could make it through the entire Dr. Phil episode. Which happened to be on spouses abusing their overweight partners. And then yes, I showered afterwards!! Need proof?? Here ya go!!



So now it's off to work on those reports. I also hit my goal of 8 glasses of water again. (2 of which were drank while on the treadmill!!)

(Oh...and the caffeine thing? My DS was nice enough to let me use money from collecting cans, with the change I had left over, and a $1 off coupon AND Wal-Mart dropped the price from $4.02 to $2.98...I was able to get a 12-pack to share for the rest of the week. He gets to share the 12-pack *and* he gets the rewards points (vanilla coke zero). So then my DH comes home with a 2L bottle of Diet Dr. Pepper because he "had to borrow $25 from work anyway." I know...it was a nice thought...I'm just scared to ask if he borrowed it from the till (aka stole?) or from a coworker??)

~~Heather