Sunday, November 02, 2008

Just a few more days....





Oh what a weekend...My spousal unit gave my son permission to go trick or treating Friday night....without consulting me first!! I had no idea where he was, who he was with or anything. I had a text message from my son asking permission, and my last break I called (last break is at 515) and no one was at home. So I called his cell phone and he was already with his friend. SU had told him to be home at 8, but didn't ask any other questions. I was livid. I told my son to enjoy, however, and that I would see him whenever he got home. Silly me...took away that 8pm curfew, but I wasn't thinking clearly. I confused my son in doing so, and didn't realize that until Saturday night when we had a chance to sit and talk. 


So....at 930, no SU is home, no child is home...I'm so mad I'm crying on my friend's phone...*sigh* It just made me so mad that SU didn't even bother to get details!! My poor friend lives 1600 miles away and was so sweet...even got me to laugh a bit. SU came home not long after that (scheduled off at 8, but does it surprise me anymore?) and sat down like nothing was wrong. Of course, to him, nothing was wrong. He asked where my son was...I said I had no idea. I didn't know where he was, who he was with or when he was coming back. I was trying very hard not to blow up at this point. 


To give my son credit, he was home at 1015. He had also remembered to lock up the house & take his key with, as well as his cell phone. And he told me on the phone who the friend was, and we made arrangements to get him home. He understands that he needs to plan ahead to make things go smoother. He also did some extra chores to make up for the ones he didn't do during the week. I'm not so mad at him, I'm furious with SU. 


He put my son's life in danger. I don't care if this is a town of only 11,000. He had no idea where my son was, who he was with, anything. And thought nothing of it. Never mind that a teenager went on a rampage and killed his parents with a broadsword 2 years ago. Never mind that when I was working at the hospital the police scanner was on and I listened to many teens getting picked up for drunk driving. Never mind the fact that he has no legal authorization whatsoever to do that. 


That was the straw that broke the camel's back. This next weekend I'll be in the Hills. I have a friend who was a paralegal and her & I will be working up a separation agreement. I will be asking Dad for help which will be really, really hard for me to do. Especially since I still owe him for the van transmission. But repaying him is in the budget I've worked up. I'm going to take a 2nd job somewhere...don't know where yet. McDonalds is hiring, just not quite sure I can do it. BUT I will if I have to. Perhaps WalMart is still willing to hire me? We'll see. 


I have a good emotional support system in place...it's the financial side of it that scares me. Plus not being able to visit the Hills as often, if at all. That will be hardest of all. But I can use a webcam to talk to them, that will help a little. It won't be the same, of course. 


I am focusing on positives at work. We had a great Halloween Party/staff meeting. Our team was "Black Eyed Ps"....kind of a fun play on words. (That's me up above.) They had pumpkin cake and cookies and hot apple cider as well. I am not getting an incentive for the month of October, but that is okay. I can't change it, so no point in getting upset. I also found out that our team is the worst team in the center. BUT if we all bring up our stats (and I admit, mine could use some improvement as well) then one of the center managers is treating us to a sub party. That will be fun. And I do adore my cubicle-mate. We have a good time together. I got the time off I needed to go to the Hills this weekend, and I got the time off over Christmas that I had planned on taking before I took this job. I was nervous about that, but they managed to work it out. That will be fun. 


So....I just need to get through these next 4 days and then I am off to the Hills...yay!! We're going to surprise my oldest nephew by being there when he wakes up from his nap Friday afternoon. That will be such fun!! 


Next week will not be so fun. At some point, I will have to sit and talk to SU about a separation (but staying in the home together at first) and ultimately a divorce. *sigh* It will be tense, to say the least. But ultimately, it is for the best. I just hope he can understand that... 


~~Heather 

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